My dear, sweet Howdy

On Easter morning, I had to make one of the toughest decisions and have Howdy put to sleep. Her stomach flipped again and it was going to be very hard for her to go through what she went through back in May. We were in Henderson for the weekend and looking back, she did many things as if it was her way of saying goodbye. The night before she died, she jumped up on the back of the couch and spent some time with my dad and she even slept with the kids (which she has never done before). After she ate on Easter morning, everything happened very quickly. She had the same symptoms that she had the last time and I knew when I left that I would have to make a very tough decision.

I can fondly remember bringing her home with me in the palm of my hand when she was just 4.5 weeks old. I fed her with a syringe until she was big enough to eat out of a bowl. She had been with me through so much and I truly hope that I gave her everything that she could have ever wanted. In the beginning, she got to do lots of traveling and even went on a few airplane rides (one time riding in first class!). She had been out to California a couple of times, Wyoming, New Mexico and lived in four different places. Every where she went, she was such a trooper. She was truly my first "baby" and will always hold a very, very special place in my heart.

Lucky for me, Dr. Irwin, my hometown vet that I have known for years, was there for me Sunday. He assured me that I was making the right decision but it still doesn't make it any easier. Howdy was 13.5 years, had some skin conditions, and couldn't see very well. Mike and Colby would tell you that she was "stinky" but Colby and I talked last night and we agreed that every time we smell something funny we are going to think of her. Mike and my dad buried her for me at the Hill and the next time we go home, Colby and I will do something to mark her grave. He's having a tough time since this is truly his first loss. We shared tears together last night and thought about all the good times that we had with her. At least he and Holden got to tell her good-bye.

I hope and pray that no one has to make this decision for one of your pets - it's just been so hard. There are so many things that make me think of her and I would give anything to have her with us still.

Howdy, I truly, truly miss you!